Innocent Thirteenth

Ori

Hey, DiNozzo!

Klondike bar!  Thank you.

You will have to buy me a Klondike for as long as I deem it necessary, Tony.  Next crack about a book and I’ll have to think of a worse punishment.  There’s those cat’ o’ nine tails, and then there’s the rack.  Nasty, nasty torture device; I know plenty of characters stretched out on it right now, too.  Sad, I like most of them, and I’m not the one who put them there.

If you seriously find those torture devices of too little severity after watching Brave, then I suppose I could always sign you up for rock climbing lessons.  Then there’s parachute jumping – but you already did that one.

I got it!  Jogging!

Weeell, when you offer me a month of Klondike bars, I guess I could leave it at that.  All right, it’s a deal.

Right, to business then.  So, this note is about the most innocent dwarf in Thorin’s company.  He’s the youngest, and youth and innocence tend to go hand in hand (at least they do in stories).  His name is Ori.

Yes, he’s the one who asks Bilbo, “What should I do with my plate?”

Now notice – notice! – he is the only dwarf to ask that.  All of the dwarves have tramped into Bilbo’s hole, “pillaged the pantry” as he himself put it, and have set the rest of his house in absolute disorder.  And here comes the youngest dwarf to ask about his dirty plate, like any child at a dinner party that isn’t sure of his manners.

I guess it’s a good thing that Bilbo never got to answer him.  Heaven only knows what he’d have said!

Next, during the song “Blunt the Knives,” Ori is tasked with putting the clean plates on the table.  He has to carry them – stacked so that they’re over his head – to the table without dropping and breaking one.  No one helps him because they’re busy cleaning everything up (and having a little fun with him, too, I think).

As he goes, Ori keeps his eyes on the stack, obviously worried that he may drop a dish.  Luckily he doesn’t.

Another indication of his innocence is Ori’s weapon of choice.  Most of the dwarves carry axes or swords.  I believe Bifur has a halberd, and all Bombur seems to fight with is his ample stomach.  Kili appears to be the only dwarf with a bow and Thorin carries the Elf blade Orcrist, or Goblin Cleaver.  And what does little Ori wield? 

A sling shot. 

Ori’s only weapon is a small sling shot.  He may have a sword, but he doesn’t seem to use it much.  He fires at an orc chief on his Warg just before Gandalf leads the company to Rivendell’s back door.  The stone hits the Warg in the snout and the monster merely shakes its head, the way it would if a fly had just bitten it.

David (of Goliath fame) Ori is not.

On top of this, all the other dwarves seem to be protective of him.  After Bilbo, he is the one they make sure to keep a close eye on.  Thorin sends him into the cave that leads to Rivendell after he fires at the orc with his slingshot, and only when the Great Goblin under the Misty Mountains suggests that they start torturing Ori first does Thorin respond to the orc’s questions.  

Orc is the hobbit word for goblin, Tony.  Oh, brother.  You know you could at least look these guys up on the Internet if you’re that against reading the book.

Oh, very funny.

Anyway, back to Ori.  When the dwarves get cornered in the trees of the forest at the foot of the Misty Mountains, Ori is helpful in tossing burning pine cones against the Wargs.  When the tree that Ori and the rest of the company have been forced to share starts to fall, Ori is nearly their first casualty.  Only Dori’s quick grab saves him from being a greasy spot on the ground.  And later, only Gandalf’s staff is keeping the two of them from becoming dwarf blotches.  This is another sign of how protective the company is of their youthful member.

It’ll be interesting to watch where Ori goes from here.  He didn’t get a lot of screen time in the theater cut of An Unexpected Journey, and that doesn’t appear to be likely to change in The Desolation of Smaug.  But the only way to find out is to watch the next movie.

Of course I’m going to watch it.  You didn’t think that I only went to the theater to see this one movie, did you?

Ugh.  You know something, DiNozzo?  You are incorrigible. 

I have to go.  Next time we talk about Thorin and Bilbo.

What?  I wanted to make sure I had my opinions on their friendship (or lack thereof) thought out properly first!

Oh, get out of here or I will make you take up jogging for a month!

Later,

Mithril 

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